Domestic abuse is an issue that’s affected students both on and off USI’s campus, but a challenge students often face is identifying the different types of abuse.

USI’s Yearly Incident Report for 2012 showed several incidents of sexual assault, including six forcible sex offenses. The year before highlighted three incidents of aggravated assault.

Considering the statistics offer no clear marker of domestic abuse, however, the exact numbers for those specific incidents on campus are left unknown. Domestic violence cases often go unreported, so the actual number of incidents is unknown.

“What I’m seeing is a biased sample,” said Stephanie Cunningham, a counselor at USI. “For most who seek help, typically by that time, it’s become more severe as a situation.”

The longer a relationship goes on, the harder it is for those involved to see it as unhealthy, Cunningham said. Once the victim adapts to the abuse, they’re less likely to seek help.

The reason a student finally decides to get help varies. Most of the time it comes from a sudden revelation that what they’re experiencing isn’t healthy, Cunningham said.

Men are often more physically abusive on average, but Cunningham is quick to point out there are myths concerning domestic abuse. The poster image of abuse is often an angry man harassing a frightened woman, but there are types of abuse that defy that stereotype.

Effects of emotional manipulation can be more difficult to identify than bruises. Men are more guilty of physical violence on average, whereas emotional manipulation is reported in equal amounts by both genders, Cunningham said.

One trait of emotional manipulation is responding with passive-aggressive behavior when someone does something their partner finds displeasing. This includes statements like, “If you really loved me, you wouldn’t go out with your friends tonight.”

This behavior can sometimes escalate to threats of self-harm if the other opts to leave the relationship, Cunningham said.

Hannah Forkel, a senior English major, has seen how domestic abuse can affect people. Several of her friends in college have encountered both physical and emotional abuse.

“Emotional abuse I think takes longer to heal from, because it affects how you see yourself,” Forkel said. “Your body can heal faster than the emotional toll it takes, and typically it starts with emotional abuse like being insulted or spoken down to.”

Individuals who want to do “the right thing” and stick around are more susceptible to becoming a victim, Cunningham said.

Largely, domestic abuse is more about power and control than gender or sexuality, which means same-sex relationships have the same struggles, Cunningham said. Due to stereotypes, abuse in same-sex relationships can often be disregarded and categorized as less severe.

Cunningham said one bright spot of her job is when students come in to talk about relationships, because “a bit of knowledge can go a long way.” Admitting there’s a problem can be the most difficult part, she said, but after a student takes the first step, there’s a greater chance for improvement.

“A healthy relationship is respectful and egalitarian,” she said. “It’s a shared experience, not a dynamic of control. Most relationships become unhealthy over time due to poor communication.”